My first cardio kickboxing class was in 1999, before that I was big into the step aerobic classes. They were fun but when I first went to a kickboxing class and I got to jab, cross and uppercut, I was hooked. Other workouts were cool but kickboxing made me feel powerful and let me release all of my inner frustrations.
For years, I had such terrible anxiety and depression. I was anxious about everything; getting in an elevator, driving through tunnels, going to work, not going to work, afraid I was saying the wrong thing to people. All of these anxieties kept me paralyzed and led to feelings of worthlessness and depression. I had tried so many medications and none of them gave me any relief. I was in an endless anxiety-depression loop. But when I went to a kickboxing class I was invincible. I could punch the air, jab at the fear and kick at all my frustration and hopelessness.
I’m much better these days, I think experience and lifestyle have helped eased many of my symptoms. I stopped trying to find an answer with pills years ago, it just wasn’t working. Kickboxing became a big part of my therapy and still is. When I have a day that is stressful, when it feels like I don’t have any control over things, I am thankful for my kickboxing class. I pull up my arm, lean over and just punch at that spot on the floor where I see the person who hurt me, my own faults that frustrate me, the insecurity I feel. It is my place where I feel I have some control, where I can release my anger and be powerful and amazing.
I’ve been doing these classes for almost 15 years. My daughters ask me if I think I can punch someone out now. I don’t know, maybe I can. All I really know is that this workout helps keep me ok. Other people do yoga to feel centered and calm, I kickbox. What helps you feel powerful and releases your frustration?